


Pearl PMS

by FalonomAfterMidnight



Series: If Gems Had Periods [3]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Gen, Gossip, Homeworld (Steven Universe), Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Irony, Menstruation, Mood Swings, Napping, PMS, Parody, Periods, Personality Swap, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Premenstrual Syndrome, Short One Shot, Shorts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-02
Updated: 2019-02-02
Packaged: 2019-10-18 16:32:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,143
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17584379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FalonomAfterMidnight/pseuds/FalonomAfterMidnight
Summary: Mother Nature drives the Pearls crazy, too.





	Pearl PMS

**Author's Note:**

> Ugh, _6teen_ was just one of my many jams back when I was a kid! Even though I never saw "Enter The Dragon"--the episode that was banned in America, the episode where Caitlin and Nikki switch personalities--when I was little (and I wouldn't have been able to understand it anyhow), adult me definitely awards Canadian shows like those that aren't afraid to delve into the more "taboo" topics! (Yikes, sorry for going off on a tangent there.)
> 
> Anyway, in canon, Gems don't have periods.

Most of the time, you would recognize Yellow Pearl the instant you see her: slender in body, yellow in color (of course), haughty, smug, no-nonsense, a bit of a narcissist, and hot-tempered.

The days before her period, however, she was rather emotional, and kind of needy.

One small incident, and there was a surprisingly high chance that she would break into tears without warning. She would cry over things that others found to be silly. (Including this one time where she literally cried over spilled liquid from a glass. Yep, totally happened.)

Today, Yellow Pearl felt that she could hopefully keep it together, despite feeling a bit down for some reason she just couldn't quite put her finger on. During her break, she decided to go for a little walk around the quarters.

Meanwhile, a duo of Amethysts were planning a fun prank to pull on this day. Being the jokesters their kind of Gem was, the two decided to hide behind a door and give someone a fright by jumping out. They thought it would be cute, and that everyone would have a good laugh together.

Yellow Pearl began approaching the door where the Amethysts were hidden on the other side.

As soon as she got close enough, they leapt out. "BOO!" they yelled simultaneously.

Startled, Yellow Pearl fell onto her butt.

The Amethysts began snickering and giggling.

"Got you!" the Amethyst with her gem on her eye chortled.

"Boy, you should've seen the look on your face!" the Amethyst with her gem on her leg teased.

But Yellow Pearl didn't find it to be funny at all. First, tears began to well up in her eyes as her lip quivered. Then, seconds later, she started bawling and sobbing. Large globs of tears rained down onto her leotard.

The guards immediately stopped laughing, now feeling terrible. "Shit, shit!" "Shh, no no!" they said over each other. The two tried to comfort and shush the yellow Gem. But she just kept crying.

Then, they heard loud stomping from down the hall. Uh-oh. Only one Gem was capable of stamping the ground at such force and volume.

The gold-haired Diamond came walking over to the scene. "What the--" she said. Yellow Diamond looked down at her Pearl whose face was a mess with snot and tears, then over to the terrified saluting Amethysts.

"My Diamond, my Diamond! We're sorry, we're sorry!" The purple Gems shouted apologies over and over again.

"You..." Yellow Diamond's face contorted in annoyance before she bent down and put her hand out, and her Pearl scrambled onto her large hand where she clung to it still wailing. "I'm so disappointed in you! You Quartzes are just too immature!" the large Gem began sternly. "But because Pearl is quite... _sensitive_ around this time of month anyhow, I'll just let you two off with a warning this time." She then turned her back and walked away with Yellow Pearl (who was calming down as her loud sobs were slowly diminished to muffled sniffling).

"Don't cry anymore, Pearl..." Yellow Diamond tried her hand at soothing, like Blue Diamond could do so far easily.

By the time Yellow Diamond had returned to her bedroom, Yellow Pearl had tired herself out from all the crying and had fallen asleep in her Diamond's huge palm.

Yellow Diamond walked over to the smaller bed, opened up the covers, gently set her tranquil Pearl down, and tucked her in. The giant Gem then left her alone to go back to her office, and quietly shut the door behind her.

* * *

Most of the time, you would recognize Blue Pearl the instant you see her: soft, sweet, quiet, kind of shy, thin in physique, blue in color (duh), and wouldn't hurt a fly if they ever somehow manifested on Homeworld.

Unfortunately, she was one of those women who just got so irritable and cranky days before her period.

You know how birds evolved from the dinosaurs? Well, if you want a clear image of what goes on in her head after a minor incident occurs, just imagine an angry _T.rex_ throwing a stomping tantrum and breaking every little thing she touches.

Waking up on the wrong side of the bed this morning did not help at all. Going out on a walk around the quarters during her break did little to help. Everything today just made her so mad, mad, MAD!

Just then, she across two Peridots gossiping and clearly having fun in their chat. Ugh, Gems with such annoying voices laughing their heads off like a bunch of childish clods already pissed her off enough, and just when she wondered if things could get worse-

"You know, I'd love to compliment Blue Diamond on the amazing work she's done..." the Peridot with her gem on her arm then began sneering. "When she finally gets off her soggy fat ass!"

"HA! I bet that there's a pudgy belly underneath that dress of hers too!" the Peridot with her gem on her chest added.

Oh, that did it. The blue-haired Gem came marching right over to the two. "What was that?" snapped Blue Pearl.

Surprised at seeing this out-of-character side of her, the Peridots didn't know what to think. "Uhh... nothing!" the green Gems stammered.

Blue Pearl reached out, grabbed them by the fronts of their jumpsuits, and lifted them right off the floor. "What did you say about my Diamond!? Huh?!" she growled. "You know, I think I'm just gonna bring you bitches right to her so you can repeat that--"

"Uwahhh, we're sorreeeee!" the chest-gem Peridot bawled.

"Please don't hurt us!" the arm-gem Peridot begged for mercy.

"You. Do. NOT. Call. My Diamond. Fat. _Or else._ " Blue Pearl shook and threatened them through gritted teeth. "Do I make myself clear?"

"Y-yes yes!" "We'll be good!" the two tearfully sputtered.

Blue Pearl sighed and let go, letting them drop onto the floor. "Keep your words." she said before storming right back the way she came. Eventually, she returned to her and her Diamond's bedroom.

"How was your stroll, Pearl?" asked Blue Diamond as her Pearl closed the door behind her.

"Fine until the end." grumbled Blue Pearl, refusing to go into the details.

Hearing the irritation in her voice, Blue Diamond figured that her Pearl's head was just too clouded to assist her stably right now. "...Would you like to take an early nap?" the Gem ruler suggested.

"Oh good, I'd _love_ to right now." Blue Pearl replied in a low voice.

"Very well, then." Blue Diamond gestured for her Pearl to come over to her bed by pulling the small covers off.

Blue Pearl climbed into her bed, and put her pillow over her head, groaning.

But hey, at least her Diamond then pulling the covers up onto her body with her fingers helped improve her mood somewhat.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
